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| SLOW PARTNER |
 DROP GENTLE HINTS TO SPEED UP ZOMBIE-SLOW PARTNERS
THE FOLLOWING ONE-LINERS HAVE BEEN SUCCESSFUL
It's still "your honour" Tom, so fire it off straight away, I'll remember the scores from the last hole.
Dick, let's get off this green to the safety of the next tee before we mark the scores down.
Harry, I think you peak at the second of your ten practice swings, it goes downhill from thereon.
Mary, will you take this much time over your putts when you get to the British Ladies Open ?
Jane, let's park the buggy between the two balls and walk across to them simultaneously.
THE ANONYMOUS COMMUNICATION
One group of golfers stole a sheet of headed club notepaper to stop one of their friends doing excessive yardage pacing out.Its 439 yards not 448 yards today he would take time to establish on most tees.It back-fired when he stormed into the club secretary's office !
However you could even open a spoof email account and send an email pointing the culprit towards this website.
Or just print off relevant sections and slip them into an appropriate sports bag in the locker room !!
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